There has been much said about romance at one time or another. Probably more
books have been written about this subject than any other throughout the
history of the world. However, there is much confusion about what exactly
romance is, and how a couple can be romantic.
Throughout the world, people say that the Latinos are romantic people, probably
the most romantic of all. But, to be honest with you, Latinos aren't romantic.
In fact, most Latinos can't even tell you what the word romantic means.
First of all, romance isn't sexual intimacy. Sex can be romantic, but that
doesn't make romance sex. Romance can include sex, and really, when a couple
is romantic it becomes a preparation for sexual intimacy.
By definition, romance is a demonstration to the other person that they are
important to you. Whatever acts that we do, which make that person feel important
can be considered romantic. It doesn't matter if they are large things, or
small, just as long as the other person feels that they are special in some
Likewise, ye husbands, dwell with them according to knowledge, giving
honour unto the wife, as unto the weaker vessel, and as being heirs together
of the grace of life; that your prayers be not hindered.
1 Peter 3:7
Giving honor is the same thing as treating the person as if they are special,
precious, or valuable. If an important person walks into the room, it is
customary to stop talking, stand up, and pay attention to that person. That's
called giving honor to them. When your spouse walks into the room, they are
more important in your life than the president of the United States. You
need to treat them as such.
Peter uses the term "weaker vessel" in this verse. Notice that he doesn't
say that the wife is a weaker vessel, only that she should be honored as
if she is a weaker vessel.
How do we treat weak, precious, valuable vessels? With much care. That's
how a man needs to treat his wife. He must constantly act towards her as
if she is that weak, precious, valuable vessel that's been entrusted to his
Romance is part of meeting the emotional needs of women for affection. However,
this doesn't mean that only men need to be romantic. Just as men need to
be romantic towards their wives, women need to be romantic towards their
husbands. Both parties need the demonstration that they are important to
the other one.
Some ideas for romantic things that a couple can do:
Buy several balloons, either regular, or helium filled. Prepare a bunch of
hearts or lips made from red or pink paper; maybe even chocolate kisses…
Place them carefully within the balloons. When you give them to your spouse,
get him or her to pot them, saying "it's very urgent that you see what's
inside. Variation: you can put gifts inside the balloons, such as a ring
wrapped in elegant paper, a ticket to a special event, money to buy
Fill a basket with small clean rocks. Write a short message on each stone
to your spouse. With your spouse, take these love stones along, and put them
in different places near you home. Just like the Israelites built memorials
to their covenant with God, you can use these as a memorial of your love
for each other. Place them at the corner, a favorite tree tree, in the pond,
on a roof...
Buy a bag of chocolate kisses. While your spouse is busy in the house. Run
out the door. Mark a trail by leaving the candy on the ground around a corner
or by some bushes. Leave a note underneath one that says: Want more kisses?
Come and find me." Ring the doorbell, and run to your hiding place. When
your spouse finds you, shower them with passionate kisses of your own.
Prepare a special lunch of your spouse's favorite foods. Don't forget to
add photo of yourself, to be the desert. Call your spouse at their work,
to remind him or her to not forget to eat, and ask him or her to come home
a little early if they can. Be ready for a special time of intimacy when
they come home.
Have a photo taken of you and your spouse in a special pose; a passionate
kiss. You can do it in a photo booth at the mall, or for something more special,
go to a professional photographer. It's best to practice your pose beforehand
at home. Don't be ashamed of your love for each other.
Visit the local fire station. Ask one of the men to take special picture
of you and your spouse that only they can capture. Tell them you want to
have a great memory of how passionate your love is, that nothing can put
out. Get them to take a photo of you in front of a shiny red fire truck,
with all the equipment. Maybe even have one of them stand by with a fire
extinguisher. It would be a great idea to give them a small spiritual gift
for their help.
Write a love letter, or poem to your spouse, on elegant paper. Most office
supply stores sell fancy papers for computers (if you don't like what they
have, adapt it, or make up your own). Send it to your spouse through the
Find a small nice box - jewelry size. Using Song of Solomon as a guide, write
at least five sentences on strips of paper describing your spouse's body
parts and how you feel when you look at him/her. Tie a ribbon around this
love box, and add new notes to it from time to time.
Take a romantic walk together, hand in hand, in the rain. Relax and allow
yourselves to get good and wet. Hug and kiss passionately in the rain. Jump
in the puddles together. Pretend you are teens. Have fun. When you get home,
dry each other off, and…
Prepare a very special picnic lunch, take along a blanket and some pillows,
and some of your favorite music, maybe even a tent. Go to an isolated area.
Eat; talk about your hopes and dreams, enjoy each other, kiss and cuddle.
Plan a surprise overnight stay at a local hotel. Make sure you keep it a
surprise. Have your spouse's suitcase packed, someone to take care of the
kids and everything prepared. Include a new sexy article in your spouse's
suitcase - maybe panties or boxers. Don't tell him or her where you're taking
them. They'll know when you pull up in front of the hotel door.
Buy a dozen flowers, or just pick them from your own garden. Cut off the
stems. Prepare a special unforgettable bath for your spouse. Secretly, fill
the tub with hot water, bubbles, perfume, and the flowers floating in the
water. Set the atmosphere of the bathroom with candles, her favorite music,
and a special drink or desert.
Experiment with different types of kisses. Which arouse you the most? Long,
short, French, sucking on one lip only, biting, on the lips, neck, lower
areas...? Try kissing with an ice cube or hard candy and sharing it... kissing
between bites of food... Moisten your lips and pat with powdered sugar for
a sweet kiss.
To make these ideas extra special, use a concordance to search for Bible
verses related to whatever activity you are going to do (food, water, cleaning,
love, treasures, heart...)