Someone I know recently said "The dilemma that women face is that most men
are slime (I will debate the percentage). This makes it difficult for
women to submit to their husbands, and in many cases, women use this as an
excuse for not submitting.
However, the problem is that God doesn't exactly give us leeway in His Word
for whether those in authority are good or bad. We are told to obey our
governmental authorities, even if they don't do those things we like.
It appears to apply here as well. Peter also tells women to win their husbands
to the Lord by their chaste actions.
Likewise, ye wives, be in subjection to your own husbands; that, if any
obey not the word, they also may without the word be won by the conversation
of the wives; 2 While they behold your chaste conversation coupled
with fear.
1 Peter 3:1-2
If a man isn't saved, or isn't acting Godly, that doesn't excuse her wife
from being submitted to him. In a way, it increases
her responsibility, so that she may win him to the Lord. God
can use that ungodly husband to mold the woman into the image that He
wants her to be.
The subject of submission is more one of attitude than of actions. It is
possible for a woman to have an attitude of submission without having the
ability to obey (if he told her to do something she couldn't do).
I like the image that the Amplified Bible gives. It says "wives subject (be
sumbissive and adapt yourseles) to your own husbands as [a service] to the
Lord" (Eph 5:22 Amplified). The first verse in the chapter
says "Therefore be immitators of God [copy Him and follow His example], as
well-beloved children [imitate their father].
Put together, this can give the image that the woman is becoming like the
man, as he is becoming like Christ. That makes the (godly) man as a visual
image and help for his family in their process of becoming Christlike.
Although the Bible commands women to submit to their husbands, there isn't
one place that it tells men to lord over, command, rule, or govern their
wives.
What the Bible does command men to do is love their wives. Actually, the
word used is the Greek "agape" love. The same type of love our God displays
towards us. However, somewhere along the way, we've lost the meaning of this
word.
Agape is the Greek translation of the Hebrew word "haceed." Although they
had the word in their language, the Greeks didn't use it, as they didn't
know what it meant. It actually came from OT covenant. In that context, haceed
means "To have an overwhelming desire to give of yourself to the other person,
for their benefit, no matter what it costs you." That's what men are supposed
to do to their wives!
One other thing, men are to haceed/agape their wives using Christ as our
example. In this context, there isn't one place in the Bible where God has
commanded us to do anything for His benefit. So, men should only "command"
their wives to do those things that are for her benefit. |